"… I’m the horse of a different color that you’ve heard people talk about….” (The Wizard of Oz – MGM Studios).
There are two aspects of my personality that, as a result of recent attention to this Journal, need to be rather clearly explained. And I am sure that when I am done explaining these two aspects of my personality, that I will probably for the most part offend a great number of people. But then, at my age, if I am not offending someone, then I guess I am not doing my job correctly.
My Spirituality:
Back in 1962 when I was being chased by the Catholics and the Jews in Cleveland Heights, when I was just 12 years old on my way to school, I suddenly had to learn in a very short period of time, about how ugly people could be in this world, regarding religion and religious prejudice. And at that time, being 12 years old, I am actually became infuriated as a child, that I was being subjected to religious prejudice, not only by my fellow Jews. But also by well-meaning Catholics.
However that as difficult as that circumstance proved to be for the duration of my life. It also set me off on a journey, spiritually speaking. And so in the years that followed I actually studied every aspect of religion that humans were engaged in. I studied every major religion that humans have become involved in here on Earth. And I did so with the specific intention of attempting to better understand the nature of religious prejudice that humanity so oftentimes embraces, or feels justified in promoting and demonstrated.
So taking the foregoing in hand, after my operation, meaning my spinal fusion, in 1968, with that operation being so dynamically catastrophic; one of the results of my having died for those 5 min. where no one was able to resuscitate me was that I actually, when I came back to life, was extremely psychic in the number of ways. And for those who are the naysayers and who do not believe in any kind of paranormal expression in humanity, all I can say is hogwash. Because in reality over the years of study I have engaged in the paranormal aspects of life I have learned absolutely that paranormal abilities are something that are extremely natural in life. Meaning that every single human being. And every creature and every form of life on Earth has paranormal abilities, and/or capabilities.
The reason that most people do not realize there paranormal abilities is in part due to the fact that doing so requires more use physically of the brain. And part of the dynamics of what happens wishes the human condition as one grows older in life, is that the brain actually begins to function a great deal more efficiently. But at the same time, due to the current evolutionary level that humanity is at, there seems to be a threshold that most people will reach whereby they will in fact only realize very minimal amounts of their paranormal abilities.
That is not to say that they do not have them. Because in reality every form of life on earth and in the universe has paranormal abilities. It is a natural part of the expression of life. But in the human condition, specifically, the amount of brain function that is necessary for people to cognitively or consciously realize there paranormal abilities means that the amount of brain function needs to be increased beyond where most people are, at this current state or stage of evolutionary progress in the human condition, have been able to realize.
So for whatever reason, after I die in 1968 and came back to life, my brain functions had increased dynamically. My brain functions actually had increased so dynamically, that my realization and my utilization of the inherent paranormal abilities that all life is endowed with, became much more active. And so as a result, my understanding of spirituality began to take on a completely different direction and understanding.
To better understand what I am talking about you need to go back to the creation of the Jewish document known as the Talmud. Now the Talmud, like the catechism, is a document that was specifically written close to the timing of not only the Spanish Inquisition, but also more specifically, the European Inquisition. And the Talmud was specifically written. Because the Jews in Europe were adamant about wanting the right to defend themselves. So the Jews went to the rabbis and basically demanded that they have the right to be able to defend themselves. But the rabbis of course came back with the answer that according to the 10 Commandments God did not give humans the right to kill. But the Jews were extremely adamant about wanting to write to be able to defend themselves. Which means they needed the right to kill their aggressors. So under those circumstances the Talmud was in fact created. And as it was created a form of Judaism known as Hasidic Judaism was in fact born.
Originally, the Talmud was only about 100 pages. And it was nothing more than a kind of dissertation, regarding the 10 Commandments, whereby as a result of that dissertation, certain justifications were in fact granted to the Jews to be able to kill under certain circumstances pursuant to their aggressors. But something also that took place with the creation of the Talmud was another dynamic that most people are not aware of.
The so-called tree of life as depicted in the Talmud goes back to a very significant event in Jewish history. Prior to the Romans invading Jerusalem, when two different tribes in the Jewish culture would meet in order to do their trading, one tribe would say to the other, or ask of the other, why should I give you a certain amount of my livestock or what I make? And the number of the other tribe would simply say. Because I am worth this much to my family and to my tribe. Meaning that at that moment Judaism was defined in terms of how much a Jew was worth to his family and to his tribe.
But when the Romans invaded Jerusalem they brought with them the concept of money. And when that happened a significant series of events took place. So when these tribes would meet to do their trading’s they would draw a diagram in the sand and off of the diagram they would draw branches representing each of the 12 tribes of Israel. And it was off of that diagram that the initial trading between the tribes took place.
So when the Romans invaded Jerusalem they brought with them the concept of money. And as bad began to take place the Jewish culture basically split into two different factions. On the one hand you had the group of the Jewish culture that maintained that under no circumstances was it fitting or proper to define the value of a Jew in terms of money. On the other hand you had another faction of the Jews who believed firmly that by defining the words of a Jew in terms of money that doing so would be much more accurate pursuant to the worth of a Jew. And these two factions began to become extremely polarized.
The group that refused to define the worth of a Jew in terms of money began to look at the diagram that was used in the trading with tremendous spiritual significance. And in point of fact, later on when the Hasidic aspect of the Jewish culture was forming at the time that the Talmud was written, that diagram became known as the tree of life. Because in reality, the tree of life is nothing more than the actual diagram that the Jews used to do their trading prior to the Romans introducing money into the Jewish culture.
But what happened after the Talmud was originally created was that the Hasidic Jews who were responsible for maintaining the Talmud began to look at that diagram, which they called, the tree of life, with a tremendous amount of metaphysical and spiritual significance. And as a result, there is a part of the Jewish faith is tremendously metaphysical in nature, and/or orientation, as a result of the, Talmudic interpretations of that diagram which was in fact known as the tree of life. And so now, in present day, the Talmud is not 100 pages. But it is in fact several volumes. And most of the Talmud is tremendously steeped in extremely deep and profound metaphysical, and/or spiritualist take understandings and expressions.
So as I was growing older in my life and began to see so many different aspects of humanity while claiming never to believe in anything paranormal, at the same time embracing so many various metaphysical orientations, and/or paranormal expressions within the human condition. I began to realize that the true direction of my spirituality was going to have to be one that would in fact embrace the paranormal, and/or metaphysical, expressions, and/or aspects of the human condition.
And so of course at that juncture my spiritual growth began to digress tremendously from the est. Jewish community, and/or communities. And I then began to become extremely independent and very much distant from most of the religions on earth. And so consequently, at that point in my spiritual growth which was sometime around 1969 and 1970, I began to define my spirituality much more in terms of the metaphysical, and/or the paranormal aspects, not only within myself but that exist within humanity. And so consequently, I began to understand how truly superfluous most religions really are. By constantly being defined in such a very linear, or flat minded manner, whereby most religions are so heavily steeped in physical dogma, meaning the physical religious dogma, that the religions are based upon, that they very rarely ever take any kind of consideration or express any kind of real understanding in the inherent metaphysical, and/or paranormal aspects, of their own religions.
And so by the time I met my darling wife Aileen in 1993, I had become quite adept in various metaphysical expressions which could be considered paranormal expressions. And my spirituality while being Judeo-Christian oriented, had become so expansive that it also embraced the Muslim and the Buddhist theological belief systems as well. And so consequently my spirituality is extremely metaphysically oriented. And it is also a kind of spirituality that embraces every aspect of religious belief in the human condition. But mostly in terms of the metaphysical, and/or paranormal, aspects of humanity. Meaning that my spirituality is for the most part metaphysically, and/or paranormally, oriented.
So what I met Aileen in 1993, with Aileen, having been raised Christian scientist, but whether also having broken from the Christian scientist Dr. them to become Wiccan for many many years. Aileen and I began to work together, pursuant to spirituality in terms of the metaphysical, and/or paranormal, aspects of the human condition. And for anyone who wants to suggest that anything Aileen and I were involved with was sinister is a very serious mistake. Because when someone suggests something like that they do not understand that the axiomatic principle of the Wiccan theological belief system is basically, to harm none.
And so over the years that Aileen and I were married. We did a number of metaphysical, and/or paranormal, experiments. And we did a lot of metaphysical work here in this house, whereby as a result of that metaphysical work, not only did this house become a sacred space. But that the entire property actually became hallowed ground. And what could in fact be considered a sacred space.
And so consequently in those last few days before Aileen died, we had discussions about how to preserve the sacred space that we had actually been successful in creating in this house. And on this property. And one of the promises I made to my darling wife Aileen was that I would continue the metaphysical work that she and I had done together to ensure that the metaphysical aspects to the sacred space that she and I had created in this house and on this property would in fact be maintained.
So consequently in addition to that, not only have I been successful in securing that the sacred space and the metaphysical work that Aileen and I did to generate the sacred space within this home. And on this property would in fact be maintained. But I have actually been successful in securing that the metaphysical aspects of the sacred space are now so strong that long after I die no matter what happens to this house the energy that is inherent in this sacred space and on this property will in fact continue regardless of anything anyone might do. And that is actually one of the other promises I made to my darling wife Aileen before she died.
So for any Catholic or Christian. However well-meaning they may be, or anyone from any of the religions, regardless of how well-meaning they may be, to believe under any circumstances that I am going to adopt the flat minded, or linear thinking of any of the major religions would be a mistake. Because I will never do that. Because my spirituality is not defined in terms that could be ever considered flat minded or linear. My spirituality has always been defined as metaphysical or multidimensional or what could be considered paranormal.
And for that reason, most religions will find my spirituality incredibly incompatible with their own definition of spirituality. And that is fine. Because I have no expectations of ever being embraced by my fellow Jews. Just like I do not ever have any expectations of being accepted or embraced by any of the four major religions. Because of the degree of metaphysical and/or paranormal aspect of my own spirituality. I totally understand that.
But it is also important that anyone from any of the four major religions when they are looking at my spirituality also understand that as well. In other words, we can be very good friends. But do not ever believe under any circumstances that I will adopt any one of the four major religions as they are currently defined in a very superfluous and possibly stereotypical, or what could also be considered a flat minded or linear manner. Because I will not. My first responsibility is to my own spirituality. Which is truly and almost totally defined in terms of the metaphysical and the paranormal. Meaning the metaphysical, or the paranormal aspects of not only the human condition at all life as well.
And in point of fact, if humanity survives over the next. Perhaps 100 or 200 years, humanity will in fact discover within themselves a tremendous amount of metaphysical or paranormal understanding that humanity to this day pretty much looks at with askance. But that is in reality an issue that currently is still up for grabs. Because humanity has become so polarized. And so filled with hatred regarding their independent religious beliefs that humanity is on the verge of destroying itself as a result of their religious hatred for one other. And as a result of that hatred any potentiality that humanity might actually have for realizing the metaphysical or paranormal aspects of themselves is extremely diminished. Because in point of fact if humanity ends up in such a turbulent conflict that millions of people are being murdered and slaughtered in the name of various religions. Then the chances are that there are going to be very few humans laughed at all to be able to ever learn how to express their spirituality metaphysically or paranormally.
Which is of course why I become very passionate about trying to wake people up to the fact that if they, meaning humanity, does not stop this horrible war that humanity is waging upon itself. As a result of religious intolerance and religious prejudice that the outcome will in fact be that most humans will simply not survive because they will be killed by each other as a result of their own religious intolerance and their own religious hatred.
And so these dynamics within the human condition are even more of a reason why I have focused my spirituality since Aileen has died with tremendous intention and dedication to maintaining the metaphysical and paranormal aspects not only of my spirituality, but of the sacred space that Aileen and I have in fact created within this home. And on this property.
Therefore, I am extremely gratified and honored that there are members of the Christian and Catholic religions and the Jewish religions and the Muslim religions that have in fact found my writing to be of value. But I need to advise any one of the four major religions that if they think I am going to embrace their religion that would be a very serious mistake because I cannot. Because if I were to embrace any one of the four major religions that would mean I would have to become more distant from my own definition of spirituality as it is metaphysically and paranormally defined. And doing that would mean that I would have to take energy and attention away from maintaining this sacred space in this house and on this property. And that I will never do.
One of the aspects of my spirituality and my spiritual work since Aileen died, is that I have actually been able to establish a kind of metaphysical or paranormal horror door between Aileen’s energy and my own. And in point of fact, one of the terms that expresses the transmission and possibly the reception of that energy is through the term known as clairvoyance and clairaudience. But of course for anyone to either accept or understand those two terms. They would have to then understand and/or potentially accept the metaphysical or paranormal aspects not only of the human condition. But life as well. And in point of fact, humanity is not become more metaphysical in recent decades but has in fact become more flat minded and linear and hateful in their thinking and their behavior. Which means most people are never going to understand the potential clairvoyance or clairaudience capabilities that most humans if not all humans and all life actually has. And that is why it is going to take perhaps 100 years before the human condition he falls to the point where the amount of brain function. They are actually able to use will increase to such an extent, where various forms of metaphysical or paranormal expression become much more normalized. And as I said, that is an issue that is up for grabs.
Because currently, the religious extremists regardless of which of the four major religions. We are talking about are so hateful and so racist that they do not really care if they kill everyone in this world as long as the last person who dies is of their own particular religion. And not only is that extremely stupid. But it is counterproductive to the positive evolutionary growth of humankind. But with that being the particular orientation of humans. These days it really becomes an issue that is up for grabs as to whether humans will evolve to the point where they will be able to use more brain function whereby they will be able to understand and actually express more of the metaphysical or paranormal aspects of themselves. Because in reality the religious extremists from all four of the different religions are much more determined on murdering and killing most of humanity. Just so that they can claim they are right. Which in reality means that all four of the religions are basically attempting to make God in their own image. Because they are not willing to understand the omnidirectional aspect of the energy that pervades this world and surrounds this world and pervades the entire universe which religion calls God.
And so consequently part of the dynamic that I get into regarding my Journal entries is to be as indecisive and as provocative, and evocative and as confrontational as I possibly can. Because it is only by my being confrontational that I can in fact become a dynamic pursuant to my discussion of the four major religions whereby I actually can achieve being a wedge in these four different religions whereby on one side the religious extremists are screaming and yelling about how they want to kill everyone else who is not of their religion. And on the other side. The participants in any one of these four major religions, is so progressive and has evolved to such a point where they truly understand that the survival of humanity depends not on murdering as many people in this world who are not of one religion or another. But that in fact depends upon humanity’s ability to put aside their religious hatred and their desire to kill everyone in order to understand that the only way humanity will in fact survive is to embrace the metaphysical and possibly paranormal aspects not only of their own religion. But of all life throughout the entire universe.
But because humanity has chosen to become more stupid over the last few generations then rather more enlightened people are becoming oriented to the point where they do not really want to learn anything that they do not already know. Because people are very interested in new knowledge. Just like they are not interested in anything they cannot understand or control. So naturally, my work attempting to polarize the extremists on one side and the progressives on another side becomes much more difficult.
And that is where my talent as a writer really comes into play. Because I have to use a number of different arguments in order to try to become a dynamic in this extremely polarized and hate filled process known as religion in the human condition.
And it is my hope that as a result of explaining all of the foregoing that anyone in any of the four major religions will understand that I have a deep respect for religion as a whole. But I have no respect for the manner in which humans have chosen to express their religious beliefs. Because most of the ways that humans express their religious beliefs is not only so linear flat minded but is filled with tremendous amounts of religious prejudice and hatred and racism and bigotry and homophobia and all sorts of other forms of egocentrism ethnocentrism to the extent where the byproduct is that millions and millions of children are being murdered every year and millions and millions of women are being destroyed and killed every year. That is the byproduct of all of the religious flat minded in linear thinking that humans are embracing at this point. So for humanity to think they are doing a good job with their religion is not only ludicrous. But it is absolutely a boldfaced lie.
Because the reality is that the only way humans will ever understand the nature of the concept of religion within the human condition is that they actually will get to a point where they will embrace the metaphysical or paranormal aspects of their own religion and of their own lives. But as the Bible and a number of other religious documents have said all through history. If you cast pearls before swine you get nothing. Meaning that if I tried to explain to the general religious communities throughout the world what I am trying to explain right here that most people not only will not understand what I am saying. But most people will actually hate what I am saying.
And so consequently, the synchronicity of my being agoraphobic as a result of my nervous breakdown actually fits in perfectly with my spiritual journey. Because after Aileen died. Part of what I do in this house is a tremendous amount of metaphysical and paranormal work every single day to maintain the spiritual and sacred aspects of this space in this house. And on this property. And given the level of hatred and violence and the desire to kill everything in this world that humanity is becoming oriented to and addicted to my work is, let us say, very important. And I have to do a lot of that work every single day. It is a never ending process. Because outside of the walls of this house. The amount of negativism and the amount of hatred and killing that exists is positively toxic.
So for anyone to really want to understand religion. The first thing they have to understand is that religion is not physically oriented or defined in the human condition. Religion is in fact metaphysically and paranormally defined in the human condition. It is only the physical expressions that humans focus on which is a mistake. Because it is the fact that humans are very regressive and do not want to progress and to expand their consciousness or their minds in order to understand that the true nature of religion and spirituality is not physical but metaphysical.
And again, trying to enlighten humanity to this aspect of the concept of religion and spirituality is as I have often explained, like trying to talk to a drug attic off of a bridge where the drug attic is about to jump to its death.
So that is really the expression of my spirituality. This is the explanation of my spiritual journey. This is the explanation of the spiritual promises I made to my darling wife Aileen before she died as a result of the work that we both did metaphysically and paranormally, with regard to our spirituality.
My Transgenderism:
As everyone knows, I him actually a symbiotic twin survivor. Meaning that when I was born, 90 min. before I was born, my female twins sister was actually absorbed into me. Prior to my being born. And in point of fact, with consultations I have had with doctors over the years, I have about 60% of my sister inside of me. Which is why I have no Adam’s apple. And which is why I have had breasts. Since I was 13 years old. And which is why I have a number of other female characteristics. And I had to hide those characteristics most of my life. And I have been abused. Because of those characteristics most of my life.
But in 1969 I met with a couple of doctors and a few nurses. And they all explained to me that one of the only ways I was ever going to survive. The level of physical pain I was dealing with from my spinal fusion was if I could change the way that I relate to pain. And at the time. It was explained to me which I have found to be very true. That men, for the most part, relate to pain in terms of reacting to the pain. Meaning that men will in fact confront the pain. But women, on the other hand respond to pain. Meaning that women will become more adaptive to the pain that they experience. And therefore women can in fact endure more pain than men can on the whole.
So as I began to understand that explanation I realized that if I continue to live only in the male gender not only what I be denying those female aspects of my own physical body and personality. But I would also be making it harder for myself to move away from reacting to my pain. Instead of responding to my pain.
And so over the years I realized that the only way I was going to actually learn how to respond to my pain rather than to react to my pain was to change my gender. And that by so doing I would in fact embrace the female aspects. Not only of my personality but of my body as well. And as my understanding became more expanded pursuant to that I realized that by becoming a female in my gender. Not only would I change the way in which I define or relate to pain within myself. But I would also change the manner in which I define and relate to my own spirituality.
And so when Aileen and I met in 1993 I had already been living for a number of years in various stages of expression, as a transgendered female. And as Aileen and I progressed in our marriage. We both decided that it was imperative that I dedicate my life to living as a transgendered female. Because we both understood that my survival physically and spiritually depended on mine being totally a transgendered female. But it was not something that I was simply doing is a life choice because it was something that I was doing in order to secure my survival spiritually and physically.
But when Aileen became terminally ill with liver cancer and liver disease. We both decided that if I continued to express my life as a transgendered female that she would have never gotten the level of cancer care that she got had I continue to be a transgendered female. So consequently, during the time she was dying, put aside my Transgenderism. Meaning I took on the male gender. And I did so in order to disguise my Transgenderism. Because I knew that if I would have taken Aileen do any ever cancer treatments as a transgendered female that the level of homophobic reaction the medical community would have been so significant that Aileen would never have gotten the care that she needed to live as long as she did.
And Aileen was incensed. She was insulted that I had to do that. Just to make sure she got the level of care she needed. She was so angered by this, that in the final days before she died she made me promise that I would go back to living as a transgendered female. She even make jokes about it one point where she said to me that she did not want me to get to where she was and not have my Transgenderism resolved within myself.
So I made that promise to Aileen. That I would go back to living as a transgendered female. And in the year that followed Aileen’s death. As I lived as a transgendered female. While continuing to do the spiritual work that she and I had done metaphysically I began to realize that as a result of myself being more pertinent and more honest within myself about my spirituality and my Transgenderism that the level of effectiveness I was having metaphysically, pursuant to the work Aileen and I had done regarding this sacred space also increased.
So my transgender is him is not just something that is physical and that life choice. It is something that has deep roots and deep connections to every aspect of my own spirituality.
And so that basically means if anyone is going to want to call me their friend or want to be a friend to me. They are first going to have to understand that my spirituality is for the most part, metaphysically and paranormally defined. And then they are going to have to understand that my life is a life as a transgendered female. But that my Transgenderism as a transgendered female is not a life choice, but he is in fact a spiritual choice. And that is something I know is very difficult for most humans to understand. Because most humans look at transsexualism and Transgenderism not is something spiritual. But is something physical. Because most humans do not have the ability to understand yet even relate to the metaphysical of paranormal aspects not only of the human condition. But life as well. And we know that is true because all we have to do is look at the news every day. And when we do we see huge amounts of the human condition engaged in such horrible hatred over religious and political differences that at this point in time. Meaning at this point in human evolution humanity is on the verge of destroying the entire human condition as a result of their own religious hatred and prejudice. So that naturally precludes humans having any real or legitimate ability to understand the metaphysical or paranormal aspects of themselves. Let alone understanding how Transgenderism could in fact be defined spiritually.
And so, consequently, it is important for anyone who wants to approach me religiously that they understand that my Transgenderism is extremely spiritually defined. And that in fact, there are certain metaphysical or paranormal procedures that I am engaged in regarding maintaining the sacred space in this house. And on this property that actually have to be done from the female perspective. Meaning I have to conduct these procedures as a transgendered female. Because if I do not, the procedures will not work. And that is in fact partially due to the fact that humanity actually is a combination of both genders. Because every man and woman that is born and every aspect of life that is expressed here on Earth is not just one gender or the other. Every single man and woman and boy and girl in the human condition actually has both genders within themselves. But culture throughout the history of the human condition has always talked girls that they are only girls. Just like humanity is taught boys that they are only voice. Because humanity does not like anything that is confusing. Humanity does not like anything that is not clearly defined. So consequently for humanity to understand that every man and woman and every boy and girl in the human condition is actually a combination of both genders is a concept that is often times just too complex for most humans to understand let alone embrace.
And that is another reason why I live a very cloistered and separate life. I have never been one to want to burden others with the spiritual journey or the cultural journey or the life journey I have been engaged in. And that is why for a solid year before Aileen and I actually physically met I was extremely resistive about every meeting her. Because I did not want to burden her life with the choices I had to make, regarding my own spirituality and my own gender expression. Let alone the physical pain I have to deal with every single second. As a result of my spinal fusion. But Aileen was relentless. And so we met. And we fell deeply in love. And we had an unbelievable marriage for 18 years. We achieved the kind of love that most humans have no concept of. Just like most humans will never understand how I have been able to actually establish a court or metaphysically between the physical world and where Aileen is. Because that is the concept that is mostly depicted in movies as fiction. Because the reality of that being real is just too scary and too complex for most humans to either embrace or to understand. And that is another reason why humans today in the modern world are engaged in so much religious hatred and prejudice to the point where people in the world are basically trying to murder each other as a result of their hatred for each other on the basis of religion and political difference.
And that again is what makes my writing Erie difficult to do. Because I have to become a dynamic in the middle of all that hatred to try to convince humanity that they do not stop this kind of violence and self-hatred that the only byproduct. It is going to come out of that hatred and violence is that most of the people in the world will die.
So for any Catholic or Christian or Jew or Muslim to approach me and believe that their religious dogma is something I am going to subscribe to is a mistake. Because whenever I am confronted with any kind of religious dogma. I do not look at it in terms of the physical aspects of that dogma. I look at it in terms of the metaphysical and paranormal aspects of that dogma. Because those are the main basic aspects of my own spirituality, and the expression of my Transgenderism.
And as I said at the beginning of this Journal entry I am sure that what I have described here will probably insult and offend most people in the world. And that is okay. Because of my age. If I am not offending a lot of people being the type of person I am then I am probably not doing my job correctly.
And I could explained the number of other things that I have learned, regarding my spiritual journey but to do so would mean that humanity would have to be a lot smarter than humanity is right now. And humanity is not that smart. Because if humanity were that smart. The deal. For example, in the European Union would not be as selfish and as limited as it is. Because the European deal that is going down is not really going to saw any of the economic problems in the European Union. Furthermore, the best experts, economically and financially throughout the world have already said that the European union breaks up that the chances are that the American economy will only survive for about 7 to 10 days. And if that happens, if the American economic system suddenly goes belly up. The only thing that will be left is barter. It will be permanent. Because when the American economy basically fails the markets will in fact be reorganized pursuant to the failure. At that reorganization could take almost 8 or nine months. So for those eight or nine months there will be no money. There will be no capitalism. There will be no contracts. Because, during those eight months the markets will not even exist. So the only way people will do business is by barter. And the wealthy will have no money and the corporations will have no money and the services that companies offered will not be based on contract but based on barter. Because money will not exist at the markets go belly up.
But the fact is that the wealthy and the corporations and the extremists politically and religiously are basically so absolutely out of control. But they do not really give a damn if they destroy the entire system as long as they can claim they are right. And they are claim of being right is basically destroying not only the economic system throughout the entire world but is also helping to be a catalyst in the distraction of the spirituality of humankind.
In be assured I am not the only one who understand what I am writing here. Not by any means. There are a number of other individuals in the world who absolutely understand every single thing I am writing and who actually have been talking about the same thing for many, many decades in human history. But mostly these people have been ignored. Mostly they have been laughed at and called stupid. Like Krishnamurthy. Like Baird T Spalding. And there are a number of others as well.
So it is as a result of humanity’s continued resistance to leave all of spiritually and metaphysically and paranormally that is really at the very basis of why humans have become so racist and so prejudiced and so negative and so filled with hatred and violence that at this point in human history humanity is on the verge of destroying not only the entire human condition. But every form of expression that humanity has ever engaged in.
And for anyone to not understand that this Journal. And the promises I made to Aileen are born out of the greatest love I have ever had in my life for any one person, meaning my darling Aileen. For anyone who is reading this Journal did not understand that the love I have for Aileen is the same type of love that I have for every single form of life in this world regardless of what religion they are regardless of what political party they are. Because I love every single human being in every single form of life in this world. That is a deep part of my spirituality.
But what I do not like. And what I have nothing but contempt for is the manner of behavior and the manner of expression that humanity has found so justifiable. And to be so justifiable that humanity is now engaged. Like I said, in a worldwide conflict where humanity is so filled with hatred and contempt for each other that no matter where you go in the entire world people are trying to kill each other as a result of religion or politics.
And this level of hatred and violence that humanity is engaged in is all the more reason why I am doing is much spiritual work with in this house. And this sacred space as much as I cannot. Because Aileen and I both knew and we both understood that the sacred space. We have created here in this house and on this property was not in the only sacred space in the world. But that in fact humanity. And the survival of humanity depends on all of the different sacred spaces such as this house and many many others throughout the entire world that were created long before the sacred space in this house and others that have been created at the same time. Because without those sacred spaces without that positive energy in the world humanity would have no chance.
And for anyone to think that I am filled with any kind of self-importance is for that person to not understand me in any way. Because I have always considered and I shall always be to my dying breath, the least of all that God ever made in this world. I fully understand that. Because it is only by understanding that I am truly the least of all that God ever made that I am able to even tap into the greatest amounts of my spirituality. Because in point of fact, the human condition is not anywhere nearly as significant as most humans would like to thank. Because in the scheme of life that exists in the universe, humanity is nothing more than a speck of dust. And for humanity. They consider themselves any more important than that is truly not only a sign of humanity’s arrogance but of their continued refusal to understand that humanity is not in fact anywhere nearly as significant as humanity likes to make itself out to be.
So of humanity, cannot put up and shut up and start respecting itself. And stop killing its own children and murdering the women in this world if humanity can stop with all of filthy lies about being pro-life walk the same time they are murdering millions of children every year and destroying women almost every single day. If humanity cannot wrap its mind around the fact that humanity has become nothing more than a huge lie as a result of their religious hatred and prejudice. If that does not happen and humanity continues behaving with all of the religious hatred and violence and desire to kill each other. Then humanity is not going to have very much potential of being able to continue for very much longer.
And for my part I do not really care. Because my promises were to Aileen to maintain this sacred space. And to continue the metaphysical and paranormal work we both did. And to do so on behalf of of humanity. To maintain a sacred space in this world of London many, many that already exist and have existed. And to do that. Because we both had a commitment not only to our own spirituality. But to the spirituality of humankind. Not to the religion or the religions of humankind. But to the spirituality of humankind. And there is a market difference between the two.
So for any of you who have been able to understand anything I have written and you now understand why in reality I really am far more female that I have ever been mail. And that is why people who really do know me do not look on me as a brother they look on me as a sister. Because they do not take any notice of the fact that my voice sounds like Ernest Borgnine. Because when they see me and make talk with me. And they become my friend. They see me as a sister, which in fact is what I am.
And when they look at me spiritually they do not see me as being a member of any one religion. But in fact a member of spirituality as defined by the human condition.
And I realize that everything I have explained, is extremely complex and very difficult for most humans to understand. But in point of fact, certain circumstances, have presented themselves, not only in this Journal, but in my life, whereby as a result of the presentations of those circumstances, it has become necessary for me to explain all of the foregoing.
And that is why in some circles I am not considered a sage. But I am considered a crone.
And that is why, when I read a lot of your comments. I end up in tears. I am not ending up in tears because I am sad. I am ending up in tears because I am so humbled by the kindness and compassion of your comments. So just because I do not answer all of your comments. If hardly any does not mean that your comments are not touching me deeply. Because they do. I read every single one of your comments. Every single one.
I tried to respond to as many as I can. But at the same time, my days are filled with an unbelievable amount of activity. I have so many different things that I have to do every day that I only have a very small amount of time to devote to resolve and comments on my Journal. And in addition, I have to use a speech program because my hands. Just are not able to use the keyboard anymore. Which is no big deal. But it is a limitation.
So I do not want any of you to think that I am not reading your comments. And I do not want any of you to think that I am not extremely honored and touched by your comments. Because I am. I want everyone who is reading this Journal to know with absolute fact that I love each and everyone of you as I do every form of life in this world as much as I have loved and as much as I love my darling Aileen, though of course in a different way. But my love for each and everyone of you is as strong as my love for Aileen. And regardless of how I write in my journal that love never goes away. My love for each and everyone of you. These huge. Just like it is for my darling Aileen.
But my Journal deals with some of the most difficult questions and issues facing every single one of us as people here on Earth and as members of the human condition. So I do not have the luxury of being overtly romantic and cute and sweet in my Journal. Because I am having to ask some of the most difficult questions of myself and that anyone who reads my Journal. And asking those questions is not easy. Because humanity does not want to even look at those questions much less ask them. And yet humanity does not start asking these questions the potentiality of humanity being able to exist much longer is greatly diminished.
So it is as a result of the work that I am doing along with a number of other people in the world who are doing. Almost exactly the same thing that really becomes a kind of guiding force to give humanity a greater potential for surviving what humanity has not least on itself as a result of religious hatred and religious prejudice and political selfishness and greed and hatred. Because that is what is overwhelming the Earth at this point.
So the answer to resolving the conflict that goes on in this world is not going to be found in the Bible. It is not going to be found in the catechism or the Talmud. The way humanity is going to ensure its own survival humanity is willing to put up and shut up and actually understand that the human condition is far more metaphysical and paranormal that humanity is currently either able or willing to understand or accept.
Epilogue:
So now you understand a great deal of the true dynamics of what I am doing. And as I said, the amount of people who will accept what I am doing, let alone understand it is truly a minority within the human condition. Because most people when they read this article are going to think that I am nothing but stupid or crazy. Because most people are so resistant to ever even involving beyond where they are that what is going on in the world today is that most people do not want to learn anything new other than what they already know. Because there is a huge resistance to learning new things in the human condition. There is a huge resistance within the human condition of celebrating difference or celebrating new knowledge. And that is why my articles, are charged the way they are. Because whether humanity likes it or not it is I and others like me who are asking these questions to give humanity a better chance of survival. But asking those questions is not easy. Because asking these questions I present in my articles are probably some of the toughest questions that humanity needs to look at, let alone needs to ask of themselves.
Just like I always say, in every single one of the four major religions the same concepts are expressed.
1. Judge not lest you be judged.
2. That which you do to the least of me will be done to you.
These two concepts are expressed in every single form of all four major religions in one way or another. And yet these two very simple concepts are the ones that most people in all the different religions do not ever really want to pay attention to. And yet they are basically the most important aspects of how religion is defined within the human condition.
So you can tell on the fact that my Journal is going to continue to be difficult. And you can count on the fact that it is going to be strenuous and very bombastic and extremely passionate. But then, that is what is required.
I will of course make this Journal entry part of my significant Journal entries so that is listed not only in the box listing my significant Journal entries. But so that it is also listed in my source notes, along with my other significant Journal entries. And I am doing that, because I know that this particular Journal entry is probably one of the most important ones I have done so far. Because understanding this Journal entry, if one is able to do that, then they are able to understand me. And if they can understand me. They can then understand my spirituality and my Transgenderism. And of course my mission as a human rights advocate.
See Also:
My Significant Journal Entries:
- My Biographical Profile
- Distractions
- My Spinal Injuries
- Now We’re Having Fun, Right?
- My Complete Medical Record Of My Caregiving For Aileen
- Connections
- Finding Neverland
- I Never Want To Stop Crying For My Darling Aileen
- How Do I love thee. The First Anniversary Of Aileen’s Rosebush
- Oh There You Are
- My Philosophy of Life
- Second Gear, My discussion of my Pro-Life, and Pro-Choice Position
- The Time I was hired to photograph and met President-elect Ronald Reagan
- My 250 Million Variable Characteristic Hieroglyphic Language
- My Global Warming Research
- Quantum Mechanics And Newtonian Metaphysics, Originally Dictated On Friday March 19, 2010 (two days before Aileen collapsed and was told she only had 2 months left to live
- Magnitude 2.6 Earthquake In Central California
- Earth Preaching
- When Cancer Meets City Code
- Religion 101
- I Am An Iconoclastic Human Rights Advocate
- The Dark Lord
- Sand On The Floor
- ACLU Court Challenge Religious Restrictions Government Funded Trafficking Victims Program
- Penelope Cruz even looks good in menswear
- An Update On How Mike DeWine Is Trying To Take My Home Away From Me
- The Truth Game
- The Tortoise And The Hare
- A Human Comedy
- Fear: One of Life’s Great Motivators
- Give Me That Old Time Religion
- The Shadow People
- Also To Be Noted
- At Last
- Midnight Madness
- The Miracle of Synchronicity
- A Sacred Space
- A Speck Of Dust On A Dirty Beach
In my opinion this information. It really is an edge inside the task. We very seriously. My spouse and i count on the following fantastic study. I will be in search of this remedy for some time. These days My spouse and i ultimately had my own response from this weblog.
Hey friend I like your blog! You have a lot of good quality information. Keep up the good work posting your blog.